Coming To Terms: Flawed Structures (Aug. 2010)

September 1, 2010


For some reason I thought the WTF factor of people’s search strings had greatly declined in August. Boy was I the F wrong.

old ladys tattoed: Getting tattooed or young people getting old ladies tattooed on them? I hope it’s old ladies getting old ladies tattooed on themselves. Like those paintings of people holding paintings of themselves that go on into infinity.

tattoo of the name ‘riker’: Wouldn’t it be awful to be named Riker and in, say, 1986 you got it tattooed on your back in gothic script? Or maybe that’d be rad.

gay emo nerd: People are usually only one or two of these things. Some go for the trifecta. Others look for them on Google for the lulz.

nerd tweed pants: “Nerd tweed” is a specific weave.

startrek twighlight data: Data does kind of sparkle in sunlight. That doesn’t excuse you from getting your Twilight on my Star Trek though.

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Gingers, Masons and Emo Nazguls (June 2010)

June 30, 2010

ginger pride: We’re all about the Nerd Pride and the Gay Pride but we’ve been remiss in supporting the Ginger Pride. Here’s some questions for debate. Has Ron Weasley hurt or helped the cause? Is M.I.A. prophet or a satirist with her video?

80 year old gay and nick daddies tube: We’re also about the 80 year old gay and nick daddies pride, apparently. Whatever a “nick daddy” is. Sounds British.

how to draw fucking cool things: This is the updated 2010 edition of How To Draw Comics The Marvel Way. It has a chapter just on drawing a kitten driving a giant robotic unicorn trampling Edward and Bella.

emo nazgul:I hate everything.  Sauron is always making me ride all over Middle Earth looking for stupid fucking Hobbits. Hobbits? Seriously? Halflings? It’s not fair. If he’s so great why can’t he just teleport them into his tower? He just doesn’t want me to have any fun. The other Nazguls don’t get it. They just go along with whatever Sauron says like they’re compelled to. Fucking sheeple. I hate everything.”

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Episode 69 – Sexy Hurdles Part Deux: Sex Shops

June 11, 2010

Heh heh. The window says Additional Entrance In Rear. Heh heh.

One has to wonder if there’s a natural reason humans surround sex with so much shame. Since continuing to bump uglies is as essential for the survival of our species as figuring out how to fix global warming, what could be the evolutionary advantage to shrouding sex with negative associations?

And is it the sex or the gauche cheesiness that makes sex shops such a hurdle for so many people?

And why are sex toys so expensive? The first time I set foot in a sex shop I was struck by two impressions. A) What is that smell? and B) I can’t afford any of this stuff!

Whatever the reasons philosphers ans sociologists will never be able to discover, people have hurdles surrounding sex. In spite of being a moderate Kevin Smith movie fan and an avid listener of Smodcast, I’d been avoiding Zack and Miri Make a Porno since I first saw a poster for it in the subway station. Something about it just have me a “no feeling” as Mandi is apt to say. Whether it was the concept of debt-riddled roomates turning to porn to pay the bills was too close to the unfunny circumstances of junkies turning to porn to support their habbit or just the childlike word “porno” gives me icky shivers like the word “panties” does, I did not want to see the film.

After having hidden it under my coffee table for six months, we finally watched it. Did we hurdle it? Did it have a heart like Chasing Amy and Smith’s best films? Was it merely a Judd Apatow rip-off as the trailers suggested. You’ll have to listen to the episode to find out.


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