Search Terms, August 2011: worse than fanfics

September 1, 2011

They say April is the cruellest month. They’ve clearly never been to Ontario is bloody August. Must be the same everywhere though as people clearly went crazy with the heat.

“john de lancie” “stephen harper”: This is perhaps the most baffling combination of personages I have ever been forced to consider. I really hope it doesn’t mean Q is going to play Harper in a bio-pic or a mini-series. Or that Stephen Harper is trying to figure out how to literally become an all-powerful entity. Most likely someone was looking for this forum thread.

gifs, nerdy: Not particularily nerdy, but these GIFs are pretty amazing. Calling them “cinemagraphs” is actually pretty nerdy. Or douchie.

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Stephen Harper strangles kittens and sexy very rape (search terms, May 2011)

June 1, 2011

Springtime and a young Googler’s fancy turns to the gutter.

stamp fuck it: I wish they sold these at Office Depot along side the “Recieved” and “Draft” stamps. I suspect stamping “FUCK IT” in bold, red letters on documents that cross my desk would be very cathartic.

f for fuckballs: If I ever have a genderless baby, this is the alphabet poster I’m getting it. A is for Assholes multiplying like flies. B is for Bullshit piled up to the sky. C is for cock, everyone’s favourite tweet. D is for Dickheads crowding the street…

turd lips: Weird. Someone discovered Mandi’s secret pet name for me. Even I didn’t know that’s what it is.

انمي sexy very rape: The script there, not surprisingly, is “anime” in Arabic. We also got a search for  “انمي اغتصاب” which is simply “anime rape” without the superfluous adjectives.  This kind of implies there is, reassuringly, no phrase in Arabic for “sexy very rape” which no language should have a need for. Yet apparently English does. Incidentally, the Japanese word for “sexy very rape” turns out to be anime.

anime i adore u: U has so much sexy very rape.

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Episode 025: Celebrity Worship (Special Edition)

July 16, 2009

Inspired by the recent spectacle of his death no doubt, Tony Pucci suggested we do Michael Jackson as a topic. I thought we could go one further and do an episode on Celebrity Worship in general. At some point in my life I can’t remember, I suddenly stopped regarding celebrated individuals as anything more than “just some person who happens to make records or act in movies or run countries.” Or it may have been a gradual shift. I can’t tell. I know that I went from being a teenager starstruck by seeing his idols on stage to an adult with a vague sense of “meh” at the same.

Stephen Harper proving hes just a guy... who strangles kittens

Stephen Harper proving he’s just a guy… who strangles kittens

Perhaps it was having several friends who’d reached a certain level of professional success in the entertainment fields which dulled me to stardust. Or perhaps it was being involved in promoting rock shows where you interact with people who happen to be famous but really no different from the local unknowns in the opening act (only probably less lazy). Eventually you obtain the perspective that musicians are either just “regular joes” or are insane, ego-maniacal  fuckwits who lack any sense of reality and how they fit into it. And what makes them insane, ego-maniacal  fuckwits is that they’re also just another person.

Now when I see famous people in the flesh, I do still get a bit of that sense of otherness about them. But it’s in the same way as visiting a famous, historic landmark. Like when you stand at the foot of the Eiffel Tower and suddenly are struck with the sense you are seeing this structure that millions of other people have seen; that you are able to reach out and touch this cliché piece of clip art everyone has been bombarded with since birth—and how it’s really just a big lump of wire and steel. There’s something surreal about seeing a face you only know from illuminated screens or glossy magazine pages. And even more surreal to know they’re just another human who by ambition or luck happens to be famous.

Related links: David Lynch (someone what we’re obsessed with); GOWN (Andrew what got us tickets); More Andrew on video; Infamous: Robert Pickton The Pig Farm Killer; Famous: MJ; The Box Room (unwitting but gracious Nerd Hurdles impostors); Megan Fox zombie (what is only here to attract Google hits); Boz (what sent in an audio comment); Tony Pucci (what sort of suggested the topic).

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